12 Ways To Update How You Network

By Hannah Morgan - Career Sherpa - Reprinted with permission

If you've been reluctant to network or you've tried it and it just wasn't for you, don't give up- update how you network. It is still the best career insurance you can have! Maybe you just need a fresh approach to networking. These 12 updates will help. Given our short attention spans, pressing time commitments and data overload, it has become increasingly difficult to make a lasting and meaningful connection with new contacts. In order to address the scarcity of time and distractions, you'll probably want to try some new ideas and update how you network... Read More

Real people, events inspire military storylines in NBC show 'This Is Us'

By Nikki Wentling | Stars and Stripes - Reprinted with Permission - ©2019 All rights reserved

WASHINGTON — The fourth season of the Emmy-winning TV show "This Is Us" has introduced a female Marine, who viewers first see in Afghanistan on a video call with her husband. The tearful call abruptly ends when a superior officer yells out her last name — "Sharp!" The character's name, Cassidy Sharp, is an homage to a real-world Marine: Lance Cpl. Charles "Seth" Sharp, who was killed in Afghanistan on July 2, 2009, as his unit pushed into the Taliban-controlled Helmand province. He was 20 and the first Marine... Read More

Military sees frustrating trend as suicides spike

By LOLITA C. BALDOR - Associated Press - Reprinted with permission ©2019 All Rights Reserved

WASHINGTON (AP) — Military suicides have surged to a record high among active duty troops, continuing a deadly trend that Pentagon officials say is frustrating and they are struggling to counter. The Army, Navy and Marine Corps all saw the rate of suicides go up as well as the overall numbers, with only the Air Force showing a decrease, according to data released by the Pentagon Thursday. Suicides among members of the Reserves and the National Guard also grew. The difficulties involved in identifying service members with possible problems and finding ways to prevent suicides were underscored earlier this month when the Navy reported that three... Read More

How to pitch new ideas in the corporate world and your personal life

By HRNasty - Reprinted with permission

How do you present new ideas at work? Have you ever pitched an idea to our boss and run into a brick wall? Was your idea shot full of holes or dismissed? Today I provide insight into why some new ideas get off the ground and others die on the vine. Of course, I am going to share tips to strengthen your pitch, so your ideas are launched to success. As an HR and Operations lifer, I have seen many employees present new ideas to improve the company, department, products, and processes. Even simple ideas like the selection of the snacks in the kitchen have fallen flat, simply because of the way the new idea was presented. It's not what we say, it's how we say it... Read More

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12 Ways To Update How You Network

By Hannah Morgan - Career Sherpa - Reprinted with permission

If you've been reluctant to network or you've tried it and it just wasn't for you, don't give up- update how you network. It is still the best career insurance you can have!

Maybe you just need a fresh approach to networking. These 12 updates will help.

Given our short attention spans, pressing time commitments and data overload, it has become increasingly difficult to make a lasting and meaningful connection with new contacts.

In order to address the scarcity of time and distractions, you'll probably want to try some new ideas and update how you network!

Ditch The Old Pitch

If you struggle with what to say when someone asks you the question "what do you do?" you aren't alone. Answering this question trips up even the most experienced professionals. But there's a new secret formula that is short and snappy and immediately turns your questioning over to the other person.

"I help [who benefits from your work] by [problem you solve]. And what do you do?"

For example, this is how a human resources professional may answer the dreaded question:

"I help managers at XYZ company hire and keep the best talent by getting the real job requirements and teaching them how to interview for those skills. And what do you do?"

For more help with a super short, conversational pitch, check out Micro-Pitch.

Scan Instead of Swap

Why not immediately swap your contact information at the next big networking event by using LinkedIn's QR code. Just pull up your code from your phone's LinkedIn app and ask the person to scan it using their LinkedIn app. Not only will this save money on business cards, but the novelty of exchanging contact information this way may make great (or memorable) conversation. Using technology is a fun way to update how you network.

Make It Real

Instead of opening a conversation with a safe and rather boring question like "what do you do," take it to a more personal level and ask, something like:

  • "How do you like to spend your free time?"
  • "What keeps you up at night?"
  • "What are you working on?"

These less-often used conversation starters build rapport faster, are more comfortable and most importantly- set you apart. Looking for more conversation starters? Check out these Conversation Starters and Openings

Brand Yourself

Everyone may not be up to speed with the newest phone technology. This is why you should always have a professional business card on hand. Include your name, job title, phone number, email and the URL for your LinkedIn account. You could take this a step further by adding key skills, industry expertise and maybe even a short pitch. Or for more ideas, check out Business Cards- Get 'Em Now

And don't stop there.

Chances are your personal email account isn't branded. Customize your email signature with your name, phone number, your desired occupation or skills sets, plus links to your LinkedIn profile and other social networking accounts. 7 Tips to Help You Get A Better Email Signature

Meet IRL

In-person, or IRL "in real life" networking, solidifies online connections and relationships. Be bold and take the initiative to ask for a face-to-face meeting or phone call with someone you may only know online.

Maybe there is someone in an online group or forum whom you have not connected with yet. Pick up the phone and call them or at least set up a phone conversation! Or, if the person is local, invite them for coffee!

Play the Host

Either real or imaginary, you can take on the role of the host. Every organization needs volunteers. Ask to be part of the events committee and offer to manage sign-ins at the registration table. This is a great way to force yourself to meet people.

If you aren't ready to commit to volunteer, consider playing host at the next meeting or event you attend by introducing someone you've recently met with someone you know.

Close With A Give

You may be familiar with "the ask," which is the way some salespeople close their sales meeting. Instead of focusing on your agenda, needs, wants and requests, listen for the opportunity to give. The give could be a recommendation, tangible gift or just sharing relevant information or resources.

Be the Connector

The reason most people network is to get, but giving is much more satisfying. Another form of giving is introducing people. Offer to introduce your new connection or even old connection to someone you think they should meet in your network.

Fast-Track Networking

A spinoff of speed dating, speed networking events are popping up in cities everywhere. The idea is that you spend a few minutes with one person and when the time is up you rotate on to meet the next person. The purpose of these events is to meet with as many people one-on-one in a short amount of time as possible. Based on the short exchange, you can determine whom you would like to follow-up with, or not.

Connect & Link

By all means, ask if you can connect on LinkedIn with people you meet at networking events or in person. But rather than send a hasty invite right then and there from your smartphone, a better way to make a memorable impression is to write an invitation to connect that mentions something about your recent conversation.LinkedIn's mobile app makes it challenging for you to customize your invitation to connect. Though it is possible.

Stay Top Of Mind

As the saying goes, out of sight, out of mind. Don't let this happen to you. After every meeting find a unique way to follow-up with the person you met. Of course a timely thank you goes a long way, but what about giving them a shout out on your favorite social network, or a handwritten thank you with a gift card? Here are more ideas on how to follow-up and nurture your network.

Networking Isn't Really About You

The best way to make someone remember you is to make them feel special or important. Think about the people you've met and still remember today. What is it that you remembered about them? How did they do it? They probably put the focus of the conversation on you. Try it!

They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel. – Maya Anjelou

Try some of these new ideas and update how you network, you may just enjoy it!

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Real people, events inspire military storylines in NBC show 'This Is Us'

By Nikki Wentling | Stars and Stripes - Reprinted with Permission - ©2019 All rights reserved

WASHINGTON — The fourth season of the Emmy-winning TV show "This Is Us" has introduced a female Marine, who viewers first see in Afghanistan on a video call with her husband. The tearful call abruptly ends when a superior officer yells out her last name — "Sharp!"

The character's name, Cassidy Sharp, is an homage to a real-world Marine: Lance Cpl. Charles "Seth" Sharp, who was killed in Afghanistan on July 2, 2009, as his unit pushed into the Taliban-controlled Helmand province. He was 20 and the first Marine killed in the offensive.

Ric Sharp, Seth's father, watched the season premiere of the NBC drama last month, along with 7.7 million other viewers.

"It gave me cold chills," Sharp said in an interview with Stars and Stripes. "I teared up. I'm tearing up right now."

Cassidy Sharp is an amalgam of real people — her name, gender and experiences all inspired by servicemembers, some killed in action like Shannon Kent and others still alive. The direction for another character this season, Vietnam War veteran Nicky Pearson, was also crafted from real-world stories.

The focus on real people and true events in the show's military-centric storylines is largely due to James LaPorta, a Marine Corps veteran and Newsweek reporter who was hired by NBC as a technical consultant for "This Is Us." Using the stories of servicemembers and veterans he knew or wrote about, as well as his own experiences, LaPorta helped the writers shape season four.

"Hollywood seems to be optimistic in terms of wanting to get it right," LaPorta said. "But it did seem, for a long time, there were only caricatures of veterans. They were either incredibly heroic or incredibly broken. Everything in the first episode and in following episodes, I can tie to either my own experiences, someone else's or a fact or statistic."

New episodes air Tuesdays on NBC and Wednesdays on the Armed Forces Network.

Telling his story

"This Is Us" follows the lives of three siblings — Kevin, Kate and Randall — and their parents, Jack and Rebecca Pearson. It's primarily based in the present, with flashbacks and flash-forwards.

LaPorta, 32, was a fan of the show from its launch in 2016. There was a moment in season two that particularly struck him: when the show's protagonist, Vietnam War veteran Jack Pearson, gave some advice to his son, Randall, near the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington.

"Jack says he came home from war and was off-balance for a long time. He tells Randall, 'You're going to find balance again, lose it and find it again,' " LaPorta said. "And that ... I needed to hear that right at that moment.

"I know it's fictional, it's just a story. I get all that. But in that show, everything is taken from a real-life thing."

In season three, writers introduced a plot involving the Vietnam War. LaPorta took notice of its historical accuracy and discovered NBC had hired Tim O'Brien as a consultant. O'Brien, a novelist, wrote "The Things They Carried," a collection of stories inspired by his own experiences in the Vietnam War.

LaPorta, who reports on national security and the Department of Defense for Newsweek, wrote a story about O'Brien's involvement in the show. Following their interview, "This Is Us" creator Dan Fogelman extended an open invitation for LaPorta to visit the set.

Months later, while reporting in California, LaPorta stopped by. At that point, writers were planning for the fourth season. They were pondering another military storyline, acknowledging the popularity of their focus on the Vietnam War.

LaPorta, who was an infantryman in Afghanistan, was brought into the writer's room. What was supposed to be a 15-minute conversation about his military service turned into two hours.

"There were tissues all over the place; it was really a long therapy session," LaPorta said. "I laid out part of my story, and out of that was born Cassidy."

'Getting it right'

Season four of "This Is Us" premiered Sept. 24, and the fourth episode airs this week. What viewers have seen from Cassidy Sharp (played by Jennifer Morrison) and Nicky Pearson (Griffin Dunne) has been rooted in reality.

In the first episode, Cassidy, back in the U.S. and struggling with post-traumatic stress disorder, experiences a flashback and strikes her young son. LaPorta has a similar story, though he didn't hit anyone.

A few years ago, his son, about 3 at the time, was jumping up and down to a song — "Ho Hey" by the Lumineers — and LaPorta was transported back to Afghanistan, where he watched a 5-year-old Afghan boy jump on an IED.

In episode three, Nicky's experience at a vet center also contained similarities to LaPorta's history. In the opening montage to the episode, viewers see Nicky form a bond with his counselor and make strides with his sobriety — just to see it fall apart when his counselor is transferred to another facility.

LaPorta sought therapy when he returned from a 2009 deployment to Afghanistan. He built a rapport with a counselor at Parris Island in South Carolina and was "devastated" when the doctor accepted a job elsewhere.

LaPorta described watching that montage as a "gut punch," like he was watching himself.

"I felt like I was being abandoned and starting at square one with my own issues," LaPorta said. "I didn't want to have to tell my story again. I quit therapy for a long time. That's what happens with Nicky — that frustration."

The details are real, too.

One of the show writers noticed LaPorta nervously tap his chair, and they wrote that in as an aspect of Nicky's character. Cassidy's unit is LaPorta's — Echo Company, 2nd Battalion, 8th Marine Regiment.

And there are the small things that make the show accurate to real life, such as military-approved hairstyles, a correctly placed insignia, Afghan men with dyed beards and an allusion to Veteran Treatment Court.

"Since the first episode, I've been inundated with messages and emails from fellow Marines and Gold Star families," said LaPorta, who lives in Delray Beach, Fla. "Servicemembers and veterans are really appreciative of just getting it right."

'They're not forgotten'

Though Cassidy's arc is inspired by LaPorta's story, and her name is Seth Sharp's, writers decided to make the character a female Marine. About the time the season was being written, Shannon Kent was in the news.

Navy Chief Petty Officer Shannon Mary Kent, part of a small, secretive cryptologic intelligence community, was killed Jan. 16 by a suicide bomber at a restaurant in the Syrian city of Manbij. The 35-year-old mother of two was the first female U.S. servicemember killed in Syria since the U.S.-led coalition's campaign against Islamic State began there in late 2014.

LaPorta wrote about Kent for Newsweek and took notice of the public's surprise at a woman participating in a high-level, classified mission.

"It seemed like, to the average American reader, it was sort of shocking. And that stood out to me as a problem," LaPorta said. "That means there's an under-representation of women and women serving in war."

Kent was part of the inspiration for Cassidy Sharp, as were two female Marines that LaPorta served alongside. Both served as human intelligence collectors, which was Cassidy Sharp's job.

Viewers watch in the first episode as Sharp pushes an Afghan woman for intelligence on a terrorist. During the scene, Sharp calls to another servicemember, "Lasher." That name is an homage too.

Lance Cpl. Jeremy Lasher, who served with LaPorta and Seth Sharp, was killed July 23, 2009, in Garmsir, Afghanistan. He was 27. Before the new season aired, LaPorta called the families of people to whom "This Is Us" paid tribute. Seth Sharp's father encouraged everyone he knew to watch.

"I wanted everyone that I knew to watch it — family, friends, people in the area," Ric Sharp said. "I was proud and just excited to know that his name is being remembered. I'm a firm believer that when you say their names, they're not forgotten."

LaPorta wanted to warn Sharp's family of one moment in the show when Cassidy Sharp returns to the U.S. and exits a cab to be greeted by her friends and family. In the background, a neighbor holds a hand-written sign that reads, "Welcome back Sharp."

"It dawned on me that, 'Oh, Sharp never got that,' " LaPorta said. "That's something his family didn't get to experience."

wentling.nikki@stripes.com
Twitter: @nikkiwentling

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Military sees frustrating trend as suicides spike

WASHINGTON (AP) — Military suicides have surged to a record high among active duty troops, continuing a deadly trend that Pentagon officials say is frustrating and they are struggling to counter.

The Army, Navy and Marine Corps all saw the rate of suicides go up as well as the overall numbers, with only the Air Force showing a decrease, according to data released by the Pentagon Thursday. Suicides among members of the Reserves and the National Guard also grew.

The difficulties involved in identifying service members with possible problems and finding ways to prevent suicides were underscored earlier this month when the Navy reported that three crew members who served on the USS George H.W. Bush took their own lives within a week.

Asked about the deaths in the crew of the aircraft carrier, Defense Secretary Mark Esper said, "I wish I could tell you we have an answer to prevent further, future suicides in the Armed Services. We don't. We are caught up in what some call a national epidemic of suicide among our youth."

The number of suicides across the military increased from 511 in 2017 to 541 in 2018. According to the Pentagon, the most at-risk population is young enlisted men, and at least 60 percent of the time they chose a gun as their suicide method. Army suicides went from 114 to 139, while the Marines went from 43 to 58 and the Navy went from 65 to 68. The Air Force dipped from 63 to 60.

"Our numbers are not moving in the right direction," said Elizabeth Van Winkle, director of the Pentagon's office of force resiliency. She said that most of the military rates are comparable to civilians, but added, "that's hardly comforting."

Military and defense leaders expressed dismay and a resolve to do more to increase resilience in the force, train service members how to handle stress better and encourage troops to seek help when they need it. Van Winkle said the military is also looking at increasing efforts to train troops on the safe storage of firearms and medication. She said there are no consistent rules or regulations across the department and the services requiring gun locks or other controls on firearms, but that some states or bases have their own restrictions.

She and Karen Orvis, director of the suicide prevention office, said recognizing service members who may be struggling or at risk of taking their own lives is very difficult, and that sometimes suicide is a sudden, impulsive decision with little warning. They said it's difficult to identify reasons for suicide because there are so many stresses that could contribute.

They also acknowledged that service members are reluctant to come forward and seek help, because they worry that it could affect promotions or security clearances. And military leaders said they must all work harder to address those perceived roadblocks.

"Just as we talk about physical fitness, marksmanship, training and education, Marines must also be comfortable discussing life's struggles, mental wellness and suicide," said Gen. David Berger, commandant of the Marine Corps. "We must create a community where seeking help and assistance are simply normal, important decisions Marines and sailors make."

This year for the first time, the Pentagon included statistics for suicides by military spouses and dependents. Van Winkle said the most recent numbers available were for 2017, but officials are working to get better at collecting family data.

According to the report, there were 186 families that had suicides — 123 were spouses and 63 were dependents between the ages of 12 and 23.

The vast majority - nearly 70 percent - were female spouses under the age of 40, while 70 percent of the dependent suicides were males. About half of the dependents who died by suicide were at least 18 years old and, for those younger than that, most of the deaths were youth between 15 and 17.

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How to pitch new ideas in the corporate world and your personal life

How do you present new ideas at work?

Have you ever pitched an idea to our boss and run into a brick wall? Was your idea shot full of holes or dismissed? Today I provide insight into why some new ideas get off the ground and others die on the vine. Of course, I am going to share tips to strengthen your pitch, so your ideas are launched to success.

As an HR and Operations lifer, I have seen many employees present new ideas to improve the company, department, products, and processes. Even simple ideas like the selection of the snacks in the kitchen have fallen flat, simply because of the way the new idea was presented.

It's not what we say, it's how we say it

Unfortunately, there are great ideas, but because their pitch or presentation was lacking, the new idea didn't get off the ground. Everybody has ideas. The difference between successful ideas and ideas that die during the pitch is directly related to how the idea is presented.

Why is it important to get your ideas off the ground?

As an HR lifer, I can tell you that the employees who pitch and launch new ideas will have more career options than those that pitch ideas that don't take off. This can translate to new opportunities, promotions, transfers, and general likeability by our manager. In a nutshell, these employees will lead a charmed life. Regardless of where you work, or what level you are within your career, you can make a name for yourself by executing on ideas. The key is making sure the pitch is approved.

One way to set yourself up for new opportunities is to execute on ideas that improve your company. This makes sense because if you are making the company better, the company wants to give you more opportunity to make bigger and more impactful improvements.

How most new ideas are presented and the results

Leaders present their ideas using specific methods. I have seen many ideas from outside of the leadership circle presented in the following way:

  • An employee runs into a decision maker who is on their way to a meeting (or bathroom) and asks the decision maker if they "have just a minute?"

No decision maker is in the mood to listen to pitch when they need to take a pee. Leaders are role models, so to show graciousness, the leader doesn't cut the idea person off or ask, "Can we do this later?" One minute quickly turns into a few minutes which turns into the decision maker concentrating on their bathroom break and not hearing the idea. Leaders take note, here we can suggest a later time and volunteer to give our full attention.

Because we don't have the full attention of our decision maker, we are not able to build support or engagement. Ideas don't just "take a minute". There is usually discussion, and this is what our decision maker (with poopy on the mind) doesn't have time for at the moment.

How ideas die on the vine no. 2

When a new idea is presented, the decision maker will provide feedback based on their years of experience. Usually, this feedback includes additional work or research which the employee didn't consider. The employee becomes frustrated with this feedback and concludes the decision maker is either dumb, uncooperative or both. (Think teenager and parent relationship) No further work is invested and of course, the idea dies in the land of "pissed off and frustrated."

Very rarely are new ideas passed through on the first try.

The first lesson to learn about pitching a new idea is to realize the original idea is rarely the idea that will be the version which will be launched. Expect feedback on your original idea and realize it isn't a reflection on you as a person!

Think about it this way:

  1. Thomas Edison didn't invent the lightbulb on his first try, it took over 100 attempts. (The first 99 bulbs were feedback for improvement)
  2. The Wright Brothers first airplane wasn't the first one that flew at Kitty Hawk. (The first few planes were push back)

I don't have concrete data on this, but I would guesstimate that the number of employees that give up on their idea after the initial pitch is close to 80%. Of this group, 30% of the folks show frustration with the decision maker.

Ask for advice

The way to get buy-in from your decision maker is to ask for their advice. Getting your decision maker to feel invested will go a long way in the journey of an idea. A few questions you could as your mentor, sponsor, or decision maker:

  • I believe I have thought this through, what am I missing on this idea?
  • What kind of push back would you expect in my presentation?
  • What could I change to make this idea more successful?

If you show frustration towards the decision maker, they are not going to be motivated to help.

Believe it or not, pushback/feedback from a decision maker is a good sign. Consider their feedback to be your career gold nuggets. At the end of the day, decision makers that provide feedback are invested in you and your idea. These decision-makers will be more prone to lending support when they are involved and feel appreciated.

Your number 1 goal is to have your idea listened to. A negative reaction to the decision makers feedback will influence how much support is provided.

How to pitch your idea

There are two things I believe you can do when pitching a new idea.

  1. Try not to take suggestions personally. Take feedback provided seriously, but don't be offended, and don't take it personally. Regardless of how the feedback is delivered, recognize the feedback is on the idea and not on your personality.
  2. Recognize that you have been thinking about your idea for days or weeks and thought through various scenarios. This is brand new information for your decision maker and they will need time to get up to speed. They need simplified and easy to understand explanations with time to digest what they are hearing.
Get an endorsement

I run my new ideas by peers before pitching to my boss. They may have insight that I missed and can keep me from embarrassing myself. Peers and mentors can also get on board with the idea and support me in the future. This dry run can help you avoid disappointment with your decision maker.

What does my pitch consist of?

Your initial pitch will be easier to digest if you present your idea at a very high level. Written documentation shouldn't be more than a single page. This can also save you a lot of work. Set the expectation that you have an idea and want to just explore whether or not it is worth exploring. Explain you are going to keep your explanation at a very high level and don't let your decision maker pull you into the weeds. Just get buy-in at a high-level and go deeper on the second meeting.

My personal pitch formula

My pitches will fit on a single page and I refer to them as a "one-pager". They consist of the following data points and I only give a few sentences for each section. There are other models out there for pitching ideas and your decision maker may have a preferred method. Asking them directly for their preferred model will put you on the fast track to success. A few points I like to include in my one-pager:

  • (Summary) Problem we are trying to solve
  • (Action) How we are going to solve it
  • (Result) Desired outcome
  • (Budget) Financial impact

Ask for feedback and then come back with a more thorough document outlining various steps incorporating the feedback.

This process allows your decision maker time to understand and become engaged with your idea. When you are ready to execute, your idea can be flushed out and we can drive support behind the project.

Next time you are pitching a new idea, think about your audience and present your best self.

See you at the after party,
HRNasty
nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky and manipulative but with a result that can't help but be admired, a phrase used to describe someone who is good at something. "He has a nasty forkball".

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